A few wonderful Natural Laws of the common Pakistani (includes all - he, she and it)
1. Paan: You must be thinking that those red designs are the newest in the foray of Abstract art......you are absolutely .......wrong
if are caught without a paan in your mouth......thats disgraceful.....and if you think the person beside you thinks you are not amongst them.......what better way to demonstrate it other than to make red marks all over anything (or anyone) that happens to pass by.
2. Littering: What better way to beautify a country then to roll down the window of your car and throw whatever you can right in the middle of the road........an empty packet of chips would be perfect but any thing will do......and get pissed off over the governments futile attempts to keep this beautification at bay.
3. Wetting the footpath: That's the greatest of em all.......a direct connection of the human race with the animal kingdom.........marking your territory......well the Pakistani men have decided that whether the state provides watering and fertilizing roadside foliage or not...........they will play their part towards that........public place or not......if its dry......it needs to be wetted....
4. Protecting the fairer ones: Ahhh......the pakistani spirit lies in this.......if you are a pakistani guy and you say that staring at a girl is a bad thing........then you are just negating your belonging to this group......its not about staring at girls .......its the sense of protection that you provide to that girl(yeah thats what they believe)......and we have a plenty of this all around us......the favourite of em all is the public transport system......every1 trying to get a seat in the row just along the partition or even the female compartment......its just hilarious......i believe......our nation provides the best protection to the females as they are always under the eyes of one or the other....
5. Use of brotherly language:If you can't swear ...then i am sorry...thats so un-pakistani.......u need it on a daily basis (you need to have a thirst for new vocabulary)...while u r driving, eating or travelling in public transport......i think thats why the females in our society r not good drivers (ofcourse swearing is not in there make up).......if u want to survive in here......u need to practice hard for speaking something which has more of the F words than the actual message.
6. Laws on the Road: The first law is that there is no law.........so if u have got this wrong......u have a long way to go......u will find urself at the end of a traffic jam most of the time.......next....if its big....it has the right of way (u cant or shall i say should not overtake a bus while u r on ur teeny weeny car).......the zebra crossing is for the loosers......and so is the overhead pedistrian bridge......and the creatures in the white uniform mean nothing........if u think they r the traffic wardens.......keep dreaming.....
So if you can see yourself following these rules.....u r going to love being a pakistani.....otherwise.........this land is not for u.........cheers
Disclaimer: If any of these leads you into trouble.......i dont know you and this was not meant for you.
1. Paan: You must be thinking that those red designs are the newest in the foray of Abstract art......you are absolutely .......wrong
if are caught without a paan in your mouth......thats disgraceful.....and if you think the person beside you thinks you are not amongst them.......what better way to demonstrate it other than to make red marks all over anything (or anyone) that happens to pass by.
2. Littering: What better way to beautify a country then to roll down the window of your car and throw whatever you can right in the middle of the road........an empty packet of chips would be perfect but any thing will do......and get pissed off over the governments futile attempts to keep this beautification at bay.
3. Wetting the footpath: That's the greatest of em all.......a direct connection of the human race with the animal kingdom.........marking your territory......well the Pakistani men have decided that whether the state provides watering and fertilizing roadside foliage or not...........they will play their part towards that........public place or not......if its dry......it needs to be wetted....
4. Protecting the fairer ones: Ahhh......the pakistani spirit lies in this.......if you are a pakistani guy and you say that staring at a girl is a bad thing........then you are just negating your belonging to this group......its not about staring at girls .......its the sense of protection that you provide to that girl(yeah thats what they believe)......and we have a plenty of this all around us......the favourite of em all is the public transport system......every1 trying to get a seat in the row just along the partition or even the female compartment......its just hilarious......i believe......our nation provides the best protection to the females as they are always under the eyes of one or the other....
5. Use of brotherly language:If you can't swear ...then i am sorry...thats so un-pakistani.......u need it on a daily basis (you need to have a thirst for new vocabulary)...while u r driving, eating or travelling in public transport......i think thats why the females in our society r not good drivers (ofcourse swearing is not in there make up).......if u want to survive in here......u need to practice hard for speaking something which has more of the F words than the actual message.
6. Laws on the Road: The first law is that there is no law.........so if u have got this wrong......u have a long way to go......u will find urself at the end of a traffic jam most of the time.......next....if its big....it has the right of way (u cant or shall i say should not overtake a bus while u r on ur teeny weeny car).......the zebra crossing is for the loosers......and so is the overhead pedistrian bridge......and the creatures in the white uniform mean nothing........if u think they r the traffic wardens.......keep dreaming.....
So if you can see yourself following these rules.....u r going to love being a pakistani.....otherwise.........this land is not for u.........cheers
Disclaimer: If any of these leads you into trouble.......i dont know you and this was not meant for you.
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